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Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for Couples: A Clinician's Guide to Using Mindfulness, Values, and Schema Awareness to Rebuild Relationships, by Avigail Lev PsyD Matthew McKay PhD
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Review
“Couples play out symbolic themes that can come to dominate their lives together, such as ‘I will be abandoned’ or ‘my partner should meet all my needs.’ In this interesting combination of acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) and schema-focused couples work, the authors describe how to detect these themes and the pain they produce, and to change the avoidant coping strategies that rapidly turn these themes in disrupted relationships. ACT and cognitive behavioral therapists alike will feel at home inside this model, scaling their existing skills into effective couples work. A conceptual and pragmatic step forward. Highly recommended.” —Steven C. Hayes, PhD, codeveloper of ACT“There are no two authors in this world better equipped to marry the disciplines of ACT and schema process work than Lev and McKay. The way in which they bring their expertise to the specific challenges facing couples is nothing short of superb. When we get right down to it, couples work is difficult, and our technologies often fail us. This book is the state of the art in contextual behavioral approaches to couples therapy, and it should be on every therapist’s bookshelf, regardless of their theoretical stance.”—Dennis Tirch, PhD, coauthor of The ACT Practitioner’s Guide to the Science of Compassion, and founder of The Center for Compassion Focused Therapy“This book elegantly combines the strengths of ACT, schema therapy, and nonviolent communication in a very clear and coherent treatment approach to problems faced by couples. Reading it leaves you with the great and rare feeling of knowing what to do, and the confidence that it will really help your clients.”—Matthieu Villatte, PhD, coauthor of Mastering the Clinical Conversation“This is the ACT textbook we needed to have! A comprehensive and ever-so-practical guide to helping couples overcome their problems and build rich, intimate relationships. I especially like the way schemas are incorporated to fast-track defusion, acceptance, and self-awareness. Packed full of tools, techniques, exercises, and transcripts of therapy sessions, this excellent resource is a must for any ACT therapist who works with couples. And as a bonus, it’ll give you a lot of great ideas for improving your own relationships. If you want to help couples stop struggling and start loving, this book is for you.”—Russ Harris, author of The Happiness Trap and ACT Made Simple“Lev and McKay weave together their collective expertise in schema therapy, couples therapy, and ACT to bring us this much needed ACT-for-couples therapist guide. Whether you are new to schema work or ACT, or are a seasoned veteran, this well-organized, easy-to-follow book will be a valuable addition to your therapy bookshelf. Replete with sample dialogue and experiential practices, this is a must-have for any clinician who works with couples or with individuals in relationships—so basically all of us!”—Jill Stoddard,PhD, coauthor of The Big Book of ACT Metaphors“This book for practitioners beautifully synthesizes two distinctive therapy traditions, schema-focused therapy (SFT) and ACT, into a powerful step-by-step approach to couples therapy. Key SFT and ACT concepts and associated intervention strategies are presented in an easy-to-read, practical style. The authors present numerous highly revealing in-session dialogues designed to demonstrate each step of their novel treatment approach. Conducting effective couples therapy is a demanding enterprise; this book will materially increase your clinical skills and help you improve the lives of couples in distress.”—Kirk Strosahl, PhD, cofounder of ACT, and coauthor of Inside This Moment and Brief Interventions for Radical Change“As a compassion-focused (CFT) therapist, I was thrilled to see Avigail Lev and Matthew McKay’s clear and crisply written application of ACT to couples therapy. This excellent melding of schema therapy and ACT provides a compassionate and inherently de-shaming context for working with the tricky and acutely painful ways that attachment dynamics can wreak havoc in couple relationships. In their empirically supported approach, the authors guide clinicians in identifying problematic attachment-related schemas, and then in using the technology of ACT to help couples develop mindfulness, reduce experiential avoidance, improve perspective-taking, and address the barriers to values-based action so that they can build better relationships and happier lives.”—Russell Kolts, PhD, professor of psychology at Eastern Washington University, and author of CFT Made Simple and The Compassionate-Mind Guide to Managing Your Anger“This book successfully combines ACT with a schema-based approach to treating couples. The advantage of a schema formulation for therapists is that it clearly establishes a focus for treatment. It helps therapists identify schemas that underlie many conflicts, and use acceptance and emotion exposure techniques to facilitate distress tolerance. Therapists learn extremely useful strategies to help their couple clients face—rather than run away from—old unavoidable thoughts and feelings, and focus on shared values as an alternative to experiential avoidance. This well-written book uses simple, straightforward, accessible language, and does not require any prerequisite knowledge of ACT or schema therapy. With its many worksheets, exercises, and sample dialogues, this book is a great resource for any therapist who wants to help clients lead a less conflictual, richer, and more fulfilling life.”—Georg H. Eifert, PhD, professor emeritus of psychology at Chapman University, and coauthor of The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Anxiety“One of the greatest assets a couples therapist can provide to a couple in distress is a clear, accepting, honest description of the different perspectives and experiences each member of the couple brings to a conflict. On this foundation of perspective taking, couples can begin to hear each other, connect again, and eventually move forward together. Schema therapy offers great insight into the range of perspectives and experiences a person might bring to conflict—the schema formulations have withstood the tests of time, clinical practice, and clinical trials. In turn, the core processes of ACT center on relating to such experiences—in ourselves and others—in flexible and values-based ways. By melding the insights of schema therapy with the processes of ACT, Lev and McKay offer clinicians and their clients a clear, practical framework for understanding what is happening in the heat of conflict, and beginning to build bridges of understanding and acceptance. This is a wonderfully useful, readable guide that every couples therapist (or therapist who works with people in relationships) will find to be of immediate and enduring value.”—Gareth Holman, PhD, psychologist in private practice; lead author of Functional Analytic Psychotherapy Made Simple; and founding partner of OpenTeam, a consulting firm dedicated to helping business teams apply the science of psychological flexibility to communicate and collaborate more effectively towards purpose“This book is a valuable resource for any ACT or schema-focused therapists working with couples. This text teaches how to effectively recognize and address maladaptive patterns and interpersonal styles in couples therapy, and offers a variety of clear and applicable examples, exercises, and worksheets. The authors seamlessly weave together schema therapy and ACT for couples in a meaningful way that is accessible and enriching for clinicians both new and experienced in this work. This book is bound to be an appreciated addition to any therapist looking to deepen their ACT or schema-focused couples therapy.”—Laura Silberstein-Tirch, PsyD, director at The Center for Compassion Focused Therapy; adjunct assistant professor at Albert Einstein College of Medicine; president-elect of the ACBS New York City Chapter; consulting psychologist at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center; and executive director of The Compassionate Mind Foundation USA
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About the Author
Avigail Lev, PsyD, is a psychotherapist and executive coach in San Francisco, CA. She works with couples and individuals who struggle with interpersonal problems, anxiety, trauma, and mood disorders. Lev specializes in integrating acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) and schema therapy to strengthen relationships. She is coauthor of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for Interpersonal Problems and The Interpersonal Problems Workbook. Lev presents her research at regional and international conferences, and provides consultation, trainings, and workshops on utilizing evidence-based treatments. For more information, visit www.bayareacbtcenter.com.Matthew McKay, PhD, is a professor at the Wright Institute in Berkeley, CA. He has authored and coauthored numerous books, including The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook, Self-Esteem, Thoughts and Feelings, When Anger Hurts, and ACT on Life Not on Anger. He has also penned two novels: Us and Wawona Hotel. McKay received his PhD in clinical psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology, and specializes in the cognitive behavioral treatment of anxiety and depression. He lives and works in the greater San Francisco Bay Area. Foreword writer Robyn D. Walser, PhD, is associate director of the National Center for PTSD Dissemination and Training Division, and associate clinical professor in the department of psychology at the University of California, Berkeley. As a licensed clinical psychologist, she maintains an international training, consulting, and therapy practice. Walser is developing innovative ways to translate science into practice, and is responsible for the dissemination of state-of-the-art knowledge and treatment interventions. Walser has coauthored three books, including Learning ACT, The Mindful Couple, and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for the Treatment of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Trauma-Related Problems.
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Product details
Paperback: 264 pages
Publisher: Context Press; 1 edition (March 1, 2017)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 162625480X
ISBN-13: 978-1626254800
Product Dimensions:
7 x 0.9 x 9.9 inches
Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.3 out of 5 stars
15 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#453,619 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
The authors provide clear and practical steps to follow for people looking to save their relationships, and how to prevent falling into the same situation again in the future. I appreciated that foresight. Clinical examples are provided, showing how this process can really help. You just need to take the time to make it work.There are some terms that are a bit “scientific†but it is not too hard for people who don’t have that type of background to understand. If you come across a term that you don’t understand, just keep reading because chances are that it will be explained in detail. No need to worry about feeling “lost†in this book. The authors define the new terminology, then explain how to put them into practice. It is clearly well thought out, and beneficial to all. There are also little activities to participate in that really help you get your thought process flowing. You can do these with a partner, or by yourself. I realized things that I didn’t even know about myself!This is a good read for anyone, especially anyone who wants to keep their relationships strong now and in the long term. It even has skills for keeping the relationship with yourself strong! I feel like I am more prepared now to handle my emotions as they arise, without freaking out in a negative way.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for Couples is an informative read. It never occurred to me that ACT therapy can apply to relationships as well. I learned about schemas. I never heard about that before. Anyone in a relationship can learn something from this book. However, be prepared to do some work to see improvements in your relationship by using this method. There are a number of different forms for each partner in the relationship. These forms help get to the core of each person's schemas and much more. I noticed that some of the links did not work. But it does bring you to the general website. I would recommend doing this book over time because there is so much information to absorb. If you can get the links to work, I would recommend printing out the pages. You can always just do it online too. Plus, it can feel overwhelming if you try to do it all at once. It might even help to read the book or parts of the book more than once. I know I had to go back and reread some sections. The authors of the book clearly show their expertise in the pages. This is not a relationship book created by someone without career and educational experience. If you feel stuck or want additional help, there are ACT professionals out there to help your relationship.I feel like some people might need more help than just this book. However, the book is a great tool.
As a clinician I found this book to be practical, informative, and helpful. It does not provide a magic bullet to improving relationships, but rather works in the reality of every couples' dysfunctional system. This book helps couples both acknowledge and identify their own/ each other's dysfunctional sets of beliefs and patterns of engagement, and provides assignments/ tools to actively re-shape those beliefs and patterns together, as a couple.The book provides a way for a couple to forge a new way of engaging and communicating with each other. And importantly this new way of communicating is based on a core set of values that they both share.
This book has helped me immensely in so many of my relationships. My relationship with my current partner has benefited greatly, as well as my relationships with my coworkers, and mostly with my ex my wife. After reading this book my ex wife and I have become more effective and collaborative in coparenting our daughter. We have gained the skills to work together through our differences and be the kind of parents we both want to be to our daughter.
This book was not what I expected. Really hard to understand if you are not a therapist.
Really opened my eyes to underlying childhood issues at the root of my relationship/communication issues. The point of view from the therapist allows for an objective evaluation. The worksheets and example dialogues are helpful.
This book offers practical tools and techniques for creating meaningful and satisfying relationships. Accessible to therapists, individuals, and couples who want to improve their relationships in all areas of life.
shlyapa
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Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for Couples: A Clinician's Guide to Using Mindfulness, Values, and Schema Awareness to Rebuild Relationships, by Avigail Lev PsyD Matthew McKay PhD PDF
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for Couples: A Clinician's Guide to Using Mindfulness, Values, and Schema Awareness to Rebuild Relationships, by Avigail Lev PsyD Matthew McKay PhD PDF
